See "Wetlands" with Popcorn, Pop & Purell


When it comes to the gross-out comedy you might think of a couple of guys acting childish and stupid.  Maybe something from the Farrelly Brothers or the string of National Lampoon's movies from the 80s and 90s.  Each film seems to raise an imaginary bar as too who can be the absolute rudest and crudest.  It seems we have a new champion and HER name is Helen the star of the 2013 German comedy "Wetlands".  Of course when it comes to freakishly gross who else but the Germans to set a record pace.

Helen, played by Carla Juri, is an 18-year-old disillusioned teenager who literally has no boundaries when it comes to personal hygiene and sexuality.  Raised by a very clean minded mother and an absent father, she finds personal rebellion in the nastiest sort of ways.  Her parents are now divorced but have never given up hope of them getting back together. During an unfortunate shaving accident, an anal fissure,  Helen it laid up in a hospital bed getting her ass operated on.  During this time we are treated to some flashbacks and fantasies, some including her best friend Corrina, who is also a social outcast due to a chest pooping incident.  Helen develops a crush on her male nurse Robin who cautiously plays along with her twisted games.

No bodily fluid is left unexamined in this movie hence the name "Wetlands" from graphic depictions of blood (menstrual an otherwise), puke, semen, etc.  You get the picture, but what is this movie really about? Its a painfully honest and graphic portrait of getting to know who you are and not being afraid to let it out.  That no matter how hard your parents try they can't help but severely and constantly damage you as you grow up.  You become a product of your parent's own worries and neurosis.  As you get older you rebel against anything that ties you to them to hopefully find the real you.  Desperate to get her parents back together she hatches a few plans but the hurdles keep piling up and her self destructive streak comes to a head and a repressed childhood memory finally comes to light that allows her to see her mother in whole new if not disturbing light.

Like most people, her age Helen is a complex and unique person if not a bit crude and unfiltered.  She is not your stereotypical "girl"  she is a person stripped away of all proper societal bullshit and preconceptions.  She is a good person, a loving person, and above all a brutally honest person.  Obviously if your a germ phobic, clean freak, watching this movie will drive you straight to the asylum and a padded room.  But with all its cringeworthiness it's still a good watch, don't miss it.